In last week’s post, “Be Beautiful…but Don’t Caust Lust,” we discussed Teen Mania’s teachings that women should put on makeup and wear their hair in specific ways because as Dave Hasz said, “we have to look at you.”
A couple of nights ago, Fitz added such an outstanding comment that it deserves its own post. Thank you, Fitz! (Emphasis is mine.)
This is just horrible. I’ve been sitting on the sentiments behind this and it is so disgusting. The Honor Academy boasts about being a culture separate from ‘the world’ but if you compare Dave Hasz’s ideas about women’s appearance and the world’s, they are EXACTLY the same in concept. If anything, the HA works as a magnifier for this kind of sexist dribble that is completely pervasive in our society.
The idea that Dave Hasz is sending these girls is that that women, above being people they are decoration, that they owe it to men and other onlookers to maintain a certain standard of decoration, and that their bodies are public property.
It breaks my heart to see a message so destructive coming from leadership that does nothing but claim they are teaching the young women on campus to be Godly, independent women. Prettiness when done as an obligation or penance is 100% divorced from independence.
To the women of the HA who are currently there or have been there and have been affected by this message, there is something you need to know and embrace:
YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE PRETTY.
You don’t owe prettiness to anyone.
You don’t owe prettiness to your boyfriend, spouse or partner.
You don’t owe prettiness to your co-workers or your fellow interns.
You don’t owe prettiness to your mother, your sisters or your core mates.
You don’t owe prettiness to your children.
You don’t owe prettiness to civilization or society in general.
PRETTINESS IS NOT A FEE YOU PAY FOR OCCUPYING SPACE WHILE FEMALE.
Prettiness, if you choose to look pretty, is for you. Because prettiness can be rewarding, pleasant and fun. Prettiness can make you and people around you happy, and making yourself and others happy is feels nice and is often satisfying! But NEVER is your obligation to make other people happy at the expense of your body. Your body is for you and God.